Cesarean Awareness

September 23, 2010 I had my son, Gabriel, via emergency c-section at Lutheran Hospital. I labored (he was posterior and cause back labor) without pain meds for about 5 hours and made it to 9 1/2 cm or so. I had been in early labor for a week or so prior to this. My doctor broke my waters around 6cm to "speed things along" (though I was progressing normally). I agreed because who wouldn't want to get done with labor faster!? What I didn't know and what my doctor didn't tell me, is that since Gabriel was posterior (head down but facing backwards) breaking my waters increased the likelihood of a prolapsed cord which is life-threatening to the baby. He needed the extra cushion and support the water provided to turn, he also needed more time. Once I was nearly fully dilated my doctor kept asking me "do you feel like pushing?" "Are you ready to push?" over-and-over-and-over! My mom never felt the urge to push and apparently I was the same because the doc said I looked "ready." Then, the nurse told me to switch positions NOW! Apparently Gabe's cord had prolapsed (dropped in front of the cervix) and I was rushed off to get a c-section. I awoke confused, not realizing that I had given birth, and unable to speak clearly, and unable to sit up or move because of the pain-excrutiating pain. When I saw Gabriel he was swaddled and I just saw his face- his perfect little face. I cried from joy, but I also cried from grief and disappointment. A mother should be able to see the birth of her child.

My 1st view of Gabriel

 

Holding him for the first time, I needed help because I was to weak to position him properly.

Many family and friends kept telling me, "You should just be happy that you have a healthy baby." That is like telling a woman who has survived breast cancer but lost most of her hair and had to have her breasts removed "You should just be happy that you are alive." She is missing part of her identity as a woman and deserves to grieve this and have people realize that it is a real issue. Since girlhood I have dreamt of being a mom; I always knew I wanted to get married and have multiple children. Part of a woman and a mother's identity is her ability to birth a child, her ability to cope with and survive labor. It is a privilege that only mothers experience, and I feel as if I have been robbed of this. I love Gabriel dearly, he is everything to Jaime and I- I just don't love the way he had to come into this world.

Standing on my own for the first time post-surgery (Gabe is 2 days old)- you may not be able to tell but I'm in pain. 

I am sharing my story to help make women aware of what toll a cesarean takes on a woman. It's not as simple as "well she didn't even have to push, she was cut open," and any other myths there may be about c-sections. I also want to help women achieve a natural, satisfying, healthy, and safe birth. That is why I have decided to become a doula (labor assistant). A doula helps a woman during pregnancy and specifically during labor through relaxation, visualization, massage, support, advocacy (especially at a hospital against unnecessary interventions that are often considered "routine"), partner support, breastfeeding support, and much more. Since Gabriel's birth I have known that I want to help other mothers, I am so EXCITED to have finally found my calling! I told my husband and he stopped what he was doing, looked at me and said "Oh my goodness, Sweetie, it's you!! I always knew you were meant to help people, this is perfect for you." This confirmed my feelings that becoming a doula is what I am meant to do.

Also, as I have researched VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean), being a doula, and natural childbirth, it has helped me heal from my own traumatic birth experience. I hope that in the future, I can help women heal from a c-section and realize that they are STRONG, capable, beautiful women who still took part in the miracle of life. If you have had a c-section and desire to have a vaginal birth next time, visit www.ican-online.org for great support and information.

Better Sleep, Better Bum

Gabriel is 16 months old and still does not sleep through the night. He almost always wakes up 2 - 3 times a night, sometimes I'm lucky and he only wakes up once. One night it will be because he pooped or peed through his diaper, another for some unknown reason (night terror?). I had been using a Rumparooz double -stuffed pocket diaper but by 2am when he woke up it would be soaked through (some nights he made it til 6am). I finally thought- maybe if he isn't wetting through he will sleep through the night! After looking into different techniques that other moms had tried, I realized there were a lot of positive things about wool. I decided to go for it and bought 2 Disana wool covers and 7 prefold diapers just for night time use.

What you will Need:

• Either a prefold (can be cotton, hemp, etc.) or a fitted. Fitteds are nice if you are nervous about using "old-fashioned" prefolds or overnight stays at Grandma's.
• Something to secure the diaper, usually a snappi or diaper pins. 
• A wool cover. The one shown in the picture is a "pull up" style cover but there are also ones that snap or velcro on for a trimmer fit. However, the pull up style does offer more coverage. 

Large Disana 100% Merino wool cover and an inexpensive chinese prefold 100% cotton.

It has been a full week of using them and I am in love! The first night he leaked real bad but that was because I didn't have the prefold on correctly. The second night he slept from 7:15pm until about 7:25am! AMAZING! The diaper and cover lasted the whole night...and the best part??? NO RED BUM!!! I mean it looked like I let him go naked all night. Even when his pocket diaper would last all night it left his butt red (probably because the PUL outer layer kept all the moister locked inside in an attempt to prevent leaks).  Over the weekend Gabriel was sick so he woke up more often, but now that he's feeling better the past few nights he has only woken up once around 3:30am and goes back to sleep until 7 or 7:30am. It is so nice to get the extra sleep since I'm taking a heavier semester this spring.

Nice comfy leg closure so no red marks :)

And in nicer weather they can be worn in place of shorts/pants!!! How cool is that?!?

If any mammas out their are looking for a night time diapering solution for your heavy-wetter, I highly recommend some sort of cotton diaper (fitted or prefold, though prefold is cheaper) and wool cover. At the beginning of my cloth diapering experience I never would have tried prefolds, they scared me; but now that I have "experience" and more confidence, I feel silly for being so intimidated by them before, they are great!

I Love Firsts!!!

On a whim I decided to get Gabriel's hair cut. I LOVE his adorable long locks that give him crazy bed-head and lots of personality to match his character...but it was causing some issues. Like getting in his ear and making him scratch it, getting plastered to his face by boogies during naptime, and everyone at church, the grocery store, and distant cousins think he's a girl.

BEFORE (early morning hair)

I think part of the reason I hadn't seriously considered a hair cut was because I envisioned him freaking out, contorting into weird positions, and just being difficult to manage- I've seen kids get their first hair cut before. I was going to hold him in my lap but the hair cutting-lady was like "Come on, give him the benefit of the doubt" so I said "Oook, you can try." Well, what do ya know!? The boy was an angel! He just sat their while mommy held his hand and didn't fuss at all! Everybody was so impressed, including me :)

 The first snip.

 Look at my little angel! Mommy is so proud.

 AFTER (Daddy got a hair cut too).

Happy Tuesday Everyone!!!

WINTER JAM 2012!!!

So my mom got free tickets to Winter Jam by entering a Life 107.1 contest and guess what!? She gave them to us to use for Jaime's birthday (which is next week). We took my little bro Nick and his little (well not so little any more) bro Ben to the concert Friday night. Freaking AWESOME!!! Winter Jam is a Christian concert held every January and is super cheap ($10) especially since there were 10 artists! Hubby was super pumped and so was I- hello TobyMac and Sanctus Real were going to be there! Needless to say we had a great time (unfortunately I'm Queen Forget-everything-even-when-I-make-reminders so no camera pics).

Here is a music video by Jamie Grace ft. TobyMac- I hadn't really heard of Jamie Grace until last night but loved this song!

http://youtu.be/ISgr8SgCYbY?hd=1


It was really nice being able to go to a concert and enjoy great music in a family environment, hubby and I needed the break :)

Gabriel's New Skill

So I tried posting this last weekend but it would not upload my video. Then the first week of classes began and I got busy! Last Monday my MIL came to spend the day with us and while I was feeding Gabriel he showed us this new skill that he learned who-knows-where.

That's right, we caught him picking his nose for the first time! lol thought we had a little longer to wait for boogie pickin'.

Our Christmas Weekend

Usually we would drive down to Des Moines as soon as the semester is over but we decided to hold off this year since we have Gabriel (I can't even imagine spending 2 weeks out of town with a picky-sleeper toddler). Jaime and I were SOO excited to play Santa Clause and put presents under the tree Christmas Eve after Gabe went to bed! I even made homemade chocolate chip cookies, yum! We decided that since we have our own little family now that we would spend Christmas morning at our place and then drive down to see the grandparents. After church we drove to Jaime's parents in Des Moines for Christmas and Monday we spent with my parents. There was even time for a girl's day out!

Here are some pics documenting Gabriel's first Christmas as a mobile little man :)

 Coloring for the first time with daddy.

 So sleepy already

 A (failed) attempt at ginger bread houses

 Our dilapidated ginger houses

 Sliced my hand open with a pair of scissors (while opening the icing).

 PRESENTS!!

 Gabriel's bouncing turtle

 Grandmas Sandoval and Gabe

 Opening presents

 BAZINGA!!!! oh, I love that show

 We got Jessica some baby clothes

 CHRISTMAS MIRACLE!!! Gabriel slept from 6:30pm - 8:15am without waking up once! First time EVER! awww :)

 And lucky me the past 2 nights he's only woken up at 5:30ish and is back to sleep in 20min!

 Very excited/emotional about my fancy mixer

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

Dead Week

In college, the week before final examinations are often known as "Dead Week." As my mom said, "What on earth is 'Dead Week?'" Technically, it's an unwritten but socially expected agreement between the professors and students that no additional homework will be assigned during the pre-final week so that students can focus on studying. In reality, I'm pretty sure it's because we'd rather be dead than suffering through sleepless nights, hours of: reading, highlighting, group projects, fighting with our printers, stress, and headaches.

On top of the "traditional" double-whammy of homework given at this time of semester, I also had to deal with having no babysitter- which means this past week my husband and I took turns skipping whichever of our classes were "least important" so that we could watch Gabriel. In my opinion, Dead Week started last Monday, not this upcoming Monday, and it was more like "A week in Dante's Inferno."

The good thing about Dead Week and finals? CHRISTMAS BREAK!!!

I highly doubt that students would enjoy a 3 week break as thoroughly if they weren't put through so much stress before the freedom.